Please help me. I don’t even feel like living anymore. I feel like I have betrayed my parents who had so much faith in me. I feel like hanging myself.
This is a question, a student (JEE Aspirant) asked me recently.
Given below is my answer and a message to every student who didn’t perform well in exams, feeling sad and depressed.
First take a deep breath and let go of all these harmful thoughts that are plaguing your conscience. Forget for a moment that you screwed up JEE Main or Advanced, forget all the peer and family, and attain mental peace, albeit for a moment. Once you feel refreshed, go through the answer, and I feel it will go a long way in boosting your confidence.
At the outset, know that no sheet of paper, no OMR sheet, and for that matter, no examination in this world can define who you are. You are a conscience, you are a supreme creation, you are hope embodied, and 90 multiple choice questions can never realize the wonderful potential that you carry within yourself.
At this point, people will console you by telling that “Participation is more important than success”. But I sincerely do NOT think so. I think success is infinitely more important than participation. But I would like to redefine success as I see it.
To me, true success does not lie in scoring 300+ in mains, it does not lie in scoring a <100 rank in advanced, success lies in the midnight oil that you burnt while giving your all in the preparation, success lies in all those moments, when you were solving papers while your friends were having the time of their lives, success lies in the satisfaction that your parents felt when they saw you persevering day and night just to make them feel happy.
Now tell me where does JEE Main/Advanced come in this success story of yours?
You do not feel like living anymore. But why? Just because you under performed in those 3 hours of mains or in 6 hours of advanced. I feel you need a bit of introspection before you take any harsh decision, that will not only affect you, but your extended family in retrospect.
You feel that you have betrayed your parents by not performing up to the mark in one examination. Believe me, my friend, when I tell you that you are horribly mistaken. Parents understand us much more than we feel they do, and they will feel much more betrayed if you take some stupid decision, just as an atonement for your performance.
Remember, whatever you might feel from the outside, the sole wish of our parents, is to see us happy, to see us stand on our feet, enjoying our lives to the fullest. Just think what they will feel if you give up on your life. They will be the ones that will be affected the most, and in your attempt to pay for your supposed betrayal, you will end up making them feel more betrayed.
Finally, if you do not want to live for your own sake, live for the sake of your parents, for the sake of their happiness when you came to this world, and for the sake of all that they went through, just to keep you smiling and satisfied.
And lastly, do not give up for the sake of the wonderful time that you will have with them, once you come out with flying colours in your next exam, which I am sure you will.
Take a deep breath once more, have some water, and enjoy this video. Hope you can take away some wonderful message from the same.
Originally posted on Quora.